> Emotional and Mental Health > Goal Setting and Motivation

You ran around getting ready for the holidays, wrapped 47 presents, visited five different families in two days, and when it was all over, you collapsed on the couch. Now your best friend wonders if you want to set a pact to help each other keep your New Year’s resolutions.

“Sure,” you think, resolving to hang out on the couch and order in takeout. Kicking back, you try to recall whether or not you kept your resolutions last year. The problem is that you can’t even remember what you resolved to improve. You wonder: Is it useful setting resolutions or are you just setting yourself up for failure?

According to an Opinion Research Corp. survey, only 45 percent of people set New Year’s resolutions in 2005, down from 88 percent who did so in the past.

Why have we given up on resolutions? It could be because only 8 percent of people feel that they achieve the resolutions they set. Those of us who don’t follow through on our resolutions end up with a great deal of negative self-talk. We disappoint ourselves and eventually give up.

Why are Resolutions so Hard to Keep?

New Year’s resolutions are hard to keep because we usually set them at a time of year when we are already overwhelmed. And often we haven’t taken the time to think about what we want to do. We also tend to make our resolutions based on what we think other people would like us to do. We hear ourselves say: “I really should join a gym” or “I really should try to eat healthier.” We try to correct what we think society perceives as our flaws, without asking ourselves what we would truly love to have in our lives.

I am not suggesting that we abandon goal setting, just that we take our time before deciding exactly which goals to focus on. Take a moment to close your eyes and visualize how you would love your life to look. Are you able to block outside input and discover what is right for you? Can you see the details? Are you smiling?

The more you focus on the details, the clearer your goal will become. Adding details like who, what, where, when, and how you’ll achieve that goal will make it more specific and attainable.

But be honest with yourself. Developing a new behaviour requires effort until it becomes a habit. Let’s say that your goal is to make healthier food choices. To make this goal a reality, you need to plan how you will establish new habits. Where will you find simple, healthy recipes that fit in with your lifestyle? How will you prepare healthy meals in the amount of time you have available? Will you prepare meals ahead of time and freeze them? Are you willing to go to the grocery store more often to ensure that you have fresh fruits and vegetables on hand?

Although developing this new behaviour will require some work at the beginning, after one month it will begin to fit seamlessly into your life, much like all of your current habits. Taking the time to develop new habits that support your goals is definitely time well spent.

Hearing Opportunity Knock

We are bombarded with information and most of us have developed filters that help us ignore what is unimportant and focus in on what will move us toward our goals. A case in point: I am fairly certain that if a new shoe store were to open near my office I would not only notice it, I would without doubt remember to go to the opening sale. My husband would drive by the store hundreds of times and never see it, the same way I would never notice a new fishing store if it were to open nearby.

Laina Shulman, DC, is co-founder of Pure-Health, as well as a chiropractor, consultant, writer, and professional speaker residing in London, Ontario. pure-health.com

Source: alive #291, January 2007