Jesus knows family suppers aren’t always easy. But, just like that painting of the infamous “last supper,” has commensality become a relic from another time?
Le Commensal was a vegetarian restaurant in my hometown of Montreal. At one time the largest chain of its kind in Canada, it was only after it closed that I understood that its mission statement was served up in its title: Le Commensal—the practice of eating together.
“We’ve lost the time to sit down and eat,” says Gillian Crowther, PhD, a retired social anthropologist from Capilano University and author of the book Eating Culture. She says we’ve also lost the “nicer cultural side of exploring what cuisine means to people, and how it’s a sort of historical artifact.”
What are we losing by neglecting those empty chairs at empty tables?
Your gut is your second brain
Sharing recipes, methodologies, and meals among generations also means sharing traditions, hopes for the future, and family lore. (For decades, my siblings and I marvelled at my grandmother’s delicious “secret” chocolate cake recipe. One day, we saw a box of Betty Crocker mix on her kitchen counter. As deflated as we were, we never admitted our discovery to Gramma. Her secret was safe with us.)
Almost half of Canadians say they don’t have time to cook during the week, and a third of us feel guilty about it. So, in addition to fetching drive-through dinners—often consumed alone and on the run—we also give ourselves grief about our choices.
Improper nutrition and stress: the perfect recipe for triggering what registered dietician Alia Khudhair-Gilmer calls the gut-brain axis disorder, more commonly known as IBS, or irritable bowel syndrome.
“You can think of the gut microbiome as our second brain,” she says, “and when our second brain—our digestive system—is not feeling happy, it might make us not feel well mentally or physically.”
Meal sharing tips
- Start with one or two meals a week.
- Have lunch with a colleague.
- Suggest a simple potluck.
- Seek out events in your community.
Logging off and tuning in
Some solutions to improving digestive well-being are frustratingly simple: better nutrition and more mindful eating. These are more easily said than done. Ironically, in our world where electronic “connectivity” is celebrated, we’ve logged off and shut down important human interactions.
Be meal-mindful, Khudhair-Gilmer says, “What’s going on around you? Do you have a device next to you? Is there a TV on? Are you typing on a computer while you eat lunch or snacking at night? Those questions are so important.”
Replacing YouTube, Instagram, and TikTok with a friend, a colleague, or a neighbour is not only emotionally nourishing, but it also slows the meal down, which is kinder to your digestive system.
Taking the time to share a meal
A pathway to treating our bodies with kindness is when we slow down, Khudhair-Gilmer says, “We eat more slowly, we allow time for signalling from hormones. We’re being more mindful as well during that process,” she says. “We’re tuning in to how our stomach is feeling: whether we’re still feeling hungry or we’re feeling full. When we eat alone, we tend to eat very fast and really not allow time for those signals to be sent.”
Eating slowly is full-filling
Digestion is also affected, since the process actually begins while you’re chewing—saliva being the first line of defence when it comes to breaking down your food. Properly chewed food is more easily processed in the gut. Eating more slowly and savouring your meal can also reduce acid reflux, which is partly responsible for the feeling of fatigue and heaviness following a big meal (or your fourth slice of Gramma’s cake).
When your parents snapped at you to “chew your food!” they probably weren’t considering your duodenum, but they were on to something.
Mindful eating also indulges your gut-brain axis, which helps regulate cholesterol and destroy harmful bacteria. It can also help regulate your mood.
This is a system that is being monitored constantly, whether you like it or not. The vagus nerve (also impressively known as “cranial nerve X”) connects your brain and your gut. Signals are being relentlessly sent back and forth, which means that your brain is instantly aware of what’s in your stomach—like that bag of chips—long before you can even begin pretending it didn’t happen..
Indulging in a slow feast
When you share a slow feast with your troop, it also provides an opportunity to learn about each other. Crowther says that sensory engagement with your meal, and friends and family around the table, allows you to explore your own culture and biases toward food.
“We appraise food as a sort of material object, and then we begin to turn it into qualities: whether we like it or not, whether it’s salty or sweet. This speaks to our own sort of cultural upbringing, whether we have been conditioned to like those tastes and textures.
“If you can do that and enjoy the food and enjoy the company around you, then it’s something that is to be celebrated. If you can see food as a bridge, then the tradition of eating those cuisines that you know your ancestors have eaten is a way of projecting that positive future.”
As much as for digestion, a supper table is a place for deliberation and reflection, for sharing misfortune and aspiration, all while savouring something delicious. And all it takes is a little time.
Helpful prebiotics
These are foods that the body doesn’t digest, but that trigger the growth of “good germs” in the gut:
- whole grains
- apples and bananas
- lentils, beans, and chickpeas
- nuts and seeds
This article was originally published in the November 2025 issue of alive magazine.
Kenny Bodanis, author, columnist, Gemini award-nominated documentarian for RDS (the French TSN— The Sports Network). Find more of his writing online at kennybodanis.com or @kennybodanis on Instagram.
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